<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Bruised and Broken on the Battlefield by Chilly_Frost</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28542174">Bruised and Broken on the Battlefield</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chilly_Frost/pseuds/Chilly_Frost'>Chilly_Frost</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A Choice with No Regrets Spoilers, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amnesia, Canon Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Corpses, Emotional Hurt, Graphic Description of Corpses, Injured Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Levi-centric (Shingeki no Kyojin), Memory Loss, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Swearing because its Levi what do you expect, They/Them Pronouns for Hange Zoë, Titans, hurt Levi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:00:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,920</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28542174</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chilly_Frost/pseuds/Chilly_Frost</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After losing his Friends, then his squad. You could only imagine the amount of guilt he held when his new squad lost him. </p><p>Or Levi tries to adjust to not having his squad with him anymore while tasked with taking care of a bunch of brats.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Furlan Church &amp; Levi &amp; Isabel Magnolia, Levi &amp; New Special Operations Squad, Levi &amp; Special Operations Squad | Squad Levi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>85</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The proposition and dreams</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>First time writing anything Attack on Titan related so go easy on me. Though I am used to writing darker themed things as the main fandom I write things for is BSD. Because of that I got two amazing people to beta read this story for my so a great thanks to <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nettie_chan/profile">Nettie-Chan</a> and sushi#8086 on Discord.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Captain Levi, sir may I enter"<br/>The door cracked open and Levi sat at his desk sorting through paperwork and tidying his pens.</p><p>"What do you need?" Levi questioned slightly upset that someone else was now occupying space in his quarters. </p><p>"Commander Erwin and Section Commander Hange requested your presence in the main conference room"</p><p>He hummed nodding his head while turning to file away the paperwork. The ravenette figured he knew why he was being called , because of another stupid theory Erwin had. He didn't doubt Erwin at all, in fact thought highly of him. It was just that the commander had such unconventional ways of solving and consulting problems. Walking through the halls mostly undetected he came upon the door he had been forced to wait behind while higher-ups determined his punishments multiple times.</p><p>The door opened and Hange waved Levi in gesturing for him to sit down in one of the chairs. Though the Ackerman opted to sit on the bench in the back of the office, he could hear just fine from back there plus he could easily jump up and run through the door to escape if hypothetically need be. </p><p>"Levi, should I assume you don't know why you've been called here?" He nodded at Erwin signaling for him to explain. "Very well then, we want to plan another expedition-"</p><p>"No" The shorter male bluntly remarked, they had enough casualties the week prior they didn't need more anytime soon.</p><p>"If you would so kindly let me continue you might not be as opposed to this as you'd think" Hange smirked, they knew something about Erwin's plan. Levi could see a twinge of sadness shock through their eyes briefly but decided to pay no mind. "The expedition would be planned to be executed three days from now. Giving enough time for our troops to regather themselves. The risks would also be very minimal as we are only venturing at the very edge of where titans are normally found. As you very well know we suffered extreme losses due to the female titan or rather known as Annie Leonhart, some of which included your squad" Levi glanced up, he didn't understand why he would bring this up now of all times. The incident was still fresh in all of their minds including Levi's who had only just come to terms with their deaths.</p><p>"As you also well know we lost numerous corpses of the deceased due to... unforeseen circumstances. This expedition would focus on securing whatever corpses we can. As you may know, Titans much prefer live prey so the chances of recovering them would be relatively high paired with the low risk of the expedition as a whole." Erwin finished, sighing slightly then glancing at Levi and evaluating his response.</p><p>"What are the chances of recovering the corpses of my squad" Erwin expected this, while ultimately Levi would agree to go on the expedition, he still wants to be slightly selfish. </p><p>"Hm, Somewhere below sixty percent" So not great, Hange shifted awkwardly in their seat looking between the captain and their commander. </p><p>"Alright then, I will go inform the cadets" Levi stood and left the room, Erwin was smirking silently and Hange thought to themselves about how Erwin always gets Levi on his side. They know how hard it can be to convince Levi of things; through their multiple attempts at trying to get his blood sample for their "Research". They figured the two men simply had their ways.</p><p>After informing the cadets of the upcoming expedition, who by all means had taken the information just as expected ; like shit. They all questioned Levi while he didn't offer them much of an explanation other than what Erwin had told him. Maybe minus the part about him wanting to recover the bodies of Petra, Eld, Gunter, and Oluo, though they all made their assumptions.</p><p>This brought Levi to where he was now, sitting on the old castle's roof his feet dangling loosely off the edge while he stared at the waning moon. Gently the night breeze whipped his hair off his face. He shifted glancing to his sides, seemingly searching for someone. "Hello Isabel, you too Furlan. How are you two doing?"</p><p> The man chuckled softly to himself, his body expected response, to just hear his friends respond to his voice. Isabel in her signature hyper and happy voice, and Furlan telling Levi he shouldn't worry about them anymore.</p><p>"We thought our problems in the underground were hard, we were wrong, there at least we were surviving maybe not thriving but we lived. We discovered some titans are people like us, it sounds like a story you would make up, huh Isabel?"</p><p>Levi thrived in the silent nights, just alone with him and his thoughts, they always ventured far though most nights they always came back to his late friends Isabel and Furlan, Isabel having the most optimistic personality you could imagine. Furlan though having a more pessimistic outlook on life, still thought about the grand life they would have lived on the surface. The wind whispered in his ears almost trying to tell him something unintelligible. The night grew darker and Levi lays back allowing the darkness to consume his legs that still were left over the edge.  </p><p>"I should probably head back to my room and finish my paperwork. I don't think I will sleep tonight. That doesn't matter though goodnight Isabel, Furlan." He tipped his head forward and headed to the trapdoor on the floor. he could have sworn he heard voices call out.</p><p>"Goodnight Levi-bro, try sleeping for once, alright"</p><p>"Sleep tight Levi, try not to die from exhaustion, okay?"</p><p>Levi must have been really tired. He headed back to his room and continued sorting the paperwork that resided on his desk.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The expedition: Start!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Preparations for the expedition, and Levi trying to get rid of a gut feeling.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Look at this I got a new chapter out, it's a couple of hours late and I blame that on school and Ereri shippers. </p><p>In the process of writing this, I learned titans do in fact have fingers and toenails. Something about that is weird, not sure what but I don't like it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A week passes and everything is chaos. People are running around filling carts with barrels of food, water, or other necessary supplies. Some are just being rowdy and antsy as the minutes tick by getting closer and closer to the hour of departure. Others who aren't helping with prep work are practicing hand to hand combat in the field. Among those in the field, Levi stood facing Eren both getting into a stance to attack. </p><p>"Yeager, try to think. You may have been taught by Annie, but that doesn't mean your on the same skill level that she was" Eren punched forward only mildly missing the Black-haired male's jaw. Taking the opening Levi gripped Eren's shoulder and bringing his knee up to leave a firm hit on the young male's chest. Eren gasped, the air being knocked out of him. The brunette collapsed to the ground gasping for air, soon standing up after a coughing fit and getting back into a position to launch an attack. They continued to spar while the others all gradually wore out and gathered around to watch the two throw punches and kicks at each other. </p><p>Armin and Mikasa stood especially close the two on edge after each attack Levi threw at Eren. The time of departure grew near yet no one wavered as they watched humanity's strongest and humanity's hope spar till one dropped. At one point a cadet had attempted to remind the captain that all the soldiers needed to leave soon; including Eren; yet neither let up.<br/>
"Captain," Eren gasped trying to catch his breath "The commander has already asked us to go to the dining hall in preparation for the expedition."</p><p>"Get me on the ground then you will leave Yeager" Eren sighed continuing his sparring session.</p><p>Their sparing match continued as Erwin sat in the dining hall along with Hange and Moblit both awaiting the arrival of the 104th and their captain. "When do you suspect they will be here, we called a meeting five minutes ago"<br/>
Hange moaned looking like they were dying of boredom "Maybe Eren turned titan! Then Levi had to cut him out and titan Eren didn't like that so they all got murdered"</p><p>"You sure do have an imagination section commander, though I suspect captain Levi more than likely is making them run drills"  Moblit laughed nervously, him still day by day being less and less convinced that Hange was as sane as he presumed.</p><p>The dining hall was full of soldiers from every team and squad, except for the Levi squad. Everyone was sat at a table chattering amongst themselves either telling jokes or making conversation about the expedition. </p><p>The door thudded open and Levi walked in his squad following by his side and an exhausted-looking Eren following behind. It wasn't obvious but Levi too was tired, he went a little overboard with training especially for it being mere hours from departure; though his squad wasn't called the Elite Squad for nothing. </p><p>Erwin rose from his seat at the front of the room and called for attention prompting the attention of the scouts. Hange, Levi, and other high-ranking officials stood at the far end next to Erwin. </p><p>"As you all know the 58th expedition is scheduled to move out to the gates in two hours. As per policy, we will give you one hour for personal preparations since the carts are already along with the horses. I trust all soldiers will report to the stables in one hour" Erwin quickly explained the regulations and expectations. Then dismissed the scouts "I trust you will dedicate your hearts, you all are dismissed."</p><p>Levi has always found these meetings before expeditions redundant, though that may have been because he always did whatever he wanted before them and rarely helped with the carts and horses unless explicitly asked. So to him, it wasn't much different. </p><p>The black-haired male took his leave and slipped out of the dining hall to hopefully shower quickly and rid himself of the sweat and dust from earlier in the day. He always made a point to shower before expeditions as he wouldn't be able to have another till they return which generally means two or more days of dirt building up without the ability to wash off.</p><p>The shower refreshed him yet there was still a faint ache from training. He brushed it off figuring it would fade by the time they left. He left to go to the stables early and tend to his horse. </p><p>Once reaching the stables he grabbed a brush and gently ran it through his horse's mane. Random tufts of black hair stood up which he combed down before settling a saddle upon its back. He reached into a pouch he had carried and pulled out a sugar cube offering it to his horse. </p><p>Everyone around him was wishing others good luck, helping them check over their gear or helping them saddle up their horses.</p><p>Levi turned his attention to the straps he was buckling onto himself. This would be a short, quick mission. They’d either manage to get the bodies of his squad back or they’d have more losses, and then they’d be back within a handful of days. It’d be simple, and Levi had been in worse situations. He decided to ignore the heavy feeling of dread that had settled in the pit of his stomach and threw his Survey Corps cloak over his shoulders. As he walked his horse out of the stable and to the gathering group with their horses, Erwin was busy going over the plan they had been telling everyone that wasn’t either of the two of them, or Hange, and everyone. Levi blocked it out, swinging himself up onto his horse’s saddle smoothly, and took his place beside Erwin. When his horse shook its head and glared at Erwin’s large horse, he calmed it with a whisper and by patting its shoulder firmly until it stood still.</p><p>“Gear in check?” Erwin asked him when he finished with the rest of the group. Levi raised an eyebrow ever so slightly.</p><p>“Of course it is,” he replied, fixing his grip on his reins. “If we’re done here, lead the way, commander. We don’t want to waste even more daylight on guiding them with baby steps,” Levi said, words dripping with sarcasm.</p><p>Erwin pursed his lips, but nodded, turning his horse and nudging her to start walking. Levi followed, guiding the rest of the group, while Hange rode at the back of the group, already rambling to anyone who would listen about tests she hoped to conduct with Yeager Titan’s cooperation. Sometimes, Levi felt slightly sorry for the kid.</p><p>Levi had become used to ignoring the attention they got as they rode out, ignored the glares, the awe-struck looks, the mutters that cursed Erwin for leading their children or siblings or friends to their death, praying Levi, Humanity’s Strongest, would bring them back. He could ignore it all he wanted, but he’d always know kids were watching him ride past and think he was some amazing role model, and he’d always know that there were people who watched him who he wouldn’t be able to look in the eye today. Levi clenched his jaw and kept his eyes on the gate as it waited to be pulled open for them.</p><p>The gate groaned as it was dragged upwards for them, and the sound of the horses' hooves thundered loudly as they spurred them on outside. Levi tilted his face upwards, feeling the sun warm his skin, and he took a deep breath in. He had a mission to complete, and the sooner they got it over with, the sooner they could get back in one piece.</p><p> </p><p>The road had been quite rocky and unworn as it was a new route because exiting through Trost was no longer a possibility.<br/>
Though they didn't have to travel far as he reminded himself of the point of the expedition.</p><p>He thought briefly of his previous squad. Of Petra, of Eld, of Gunther, and Oluo. He cursed himself silently for not being there, then reminded himself that it wasn't his fault and he knew this would inevitably happen. He just hoped it didn't happen again any time soon, he didn't want to lose the brats that recently got assigned to the elite squad. Even though by his standards they still belonged in their previous squad simply being part of the message relay. </p><p>Yeager was talking to Arlert neither smiling, though that was to be expected. Levi had figured Eren blamed himself for the death of his previous squad, it wasn't his fault though, it was simply fate. </p><p>It would have happened eventually.</p><p>The two males finished their brief conversation about whether or not they would see any abnormal titans. Levi sure hoped they didn't they could be real bitches if they wanted to. Which they almost always did.</p><p>Speak of the devil, Levi glared at Eren, he swears If Eren dies this expedition it won't be because of his stupidness or lack of self-discipline it will be because anything that can go wrong will go wrong, and it's because of Erens inability to shut up.<br/>
Levi is really considering writing a proposal for renaming Murphys Law to Erens Law.</p><p>A black flare shot up in the air alerting to an abnormal coming their way. Based on the two following black flares Levi concluded the teams had been unable to take the thing down and it was now traveling towards him. He could only hope it was just too fast or tall for them to render immobile and that there were no casualties.</p><p>Over a hill, Levi spotted two abnormals coming towards them. "Cover your ears!"<br/>
Up in the sky, black smoke flew from the flare gun Levi held. He figured he gave enough of a warning to those around him that he didn't render them temporarily deaf because. Because Levi can personally tell any recruit that it sucks ass.</p><p>A faint ringing faded from his ears as he stood on his horse and arching his back, preparing to take down the abnormal coming in their direction. "Yeager your the one who got us in this mess so you take down the one on the left with Kirstein!" Levi scowled at them "I will take down the other one, you both better not get injured or I will make you wish you got eaten by a titan, this applies to the rest of you, don't die before I return"</p><p>Once he was close enough Levi hooked on to a tree and threw himself forward and onto the titan and cutting through its left Achilles tendon. He tried taking out the right one but the cut was too shallow. Levi briefly questioned himself as it had been a while since he had made that mistake but chalked it up to it being an abnormal. </p><p>Since it wasn't taken down then he opted for the eyes quickly latching onto the titan's head and blood spewed from its eyes coating the black-haired male's shirt which immediately started to steam. The tian frantically swung its arms trying to unblind itself, or just as a last-ditch effort. Levi's hook detached and while sending the hook flying to its back so he could cut its nape, Levi's breath caught in his throat, and a sudden wave of pain radiated from his leg. His hook was ditched and retracted, and he readied his blades to stab the monster's hand, he freed himself quickly and eliminated the threat by cutting its nape.</p><p>Once safely on a tree he ripped his boot off and checked for any blood. His boot had a tear down the side along with a nasty gash on his leg, it was slightly curved and the surrounding area was inflamed. He supposed titans nails were sharper than they appeared. His squad approached and he flew down to them and jumped on his horse.</p><p>"Captain Levi, are you alright?" </p><p>"That's not for you to worry about Krista, ill be fine. I've had worse" Levi muffled his last words with his sleeve as he wiped the sweat from his face. "Good job dispatching that titan, Yeager, Kirstein, maybe ill assign you more exercises together"</p><p>The two shared glances of disgust but silently agreed with their captain not wanting to prompt him to throw something at them, even on horseback the captain's aim was scarily good. They may or may not have known that from experience.<br/>
The captain felt blood dribble down the inside of his boot, the feeling disgusted him almost as much as the pain itself.</p><p>"Bertolt, would you ride up to the commander and pass along a message. Tell him I am injured, make sure to clarify it's not lethal, or life-threatening, only a minor laceration."</p><p> </p><p>The commander received the message, he wondered If it had anything to do with the black flairs that had been fired prior. He was assured it wasn't anything major, and then prompted the boy to return to his squad, and informing Levi that they would seek shelter as it was nearing nightfall and that they would commence the operation to retrieve the bodies the following day.</p><p>The scouts all retired for the night in an old castle that had previously been the residence of the survey corps before the fall of wall Maria.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If it's been a while please tell at me to finish the next chapter TvT. Like plz, it's the only way I get things done.</p><p>On a side note also correct grammar, punctuation, and spelling or inconsistencies tell me and ill fix them. I'd rather someone point them out and get them fixed than whenever noticing and a bunch of people having to read it like that.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Sacrifice your hearts for what's approaching</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Securing the bodies are Levis squad's main goal.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>First of all trigger warning Dead Corpses, Descriptions of blood and swearing.</p><p>Now</p><p> </p><p>Ah, I'm sorry!  I said id have this chapter out on Friday and it's now Tuesday. It's mainly because I started in-person school. On a side note would like to say that this kinda ends in a cliff hanger and I apologize and I'm just gonna preface this right now and say, this week I'm not going to update because as I mentioned prior, I'm starting in-person school again so I won't have time to write, so I will instead write on the weekends.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The scouts had begun to settle into their sleeping bags in the abandoned castle that resided beyond wall Rose. The wind was fast and heavy making the trees whistle and the night cold. Levi sat on the roof similar to the week prior. Though this time it was because of lookout duty, and not to reminisce about his dead friends.</p><p>He admired the landscape the wavy hills and tall trees, all in an open field that was bordered by a small town. He wondered what it would have been like to live there, free of the muck and grime that accompanied his prior life in the underground. While grateful he was free of that life, he was thankful he had it. Without a doubt, he wouldn't be as strong as he was now without it. Though if he had grown up in a small town or city maybe he would have been taller with a larger frame. </p><p>Glancing to the side he heard a door open, Armin stepped through clutching a book in one hand, and stood slightly surprised at the captain. "Ah, Corporal Levi, I thought you were on night watch on one of the towers."</p><p>"You thought wrong" Levi paused shifting to clutch his legs cautious of the bandages tightly wound on his right leg. "I take it you're just gonna stand there like a lost puppy, or are you going to sit down?"<br/>Armin studdered for a moment quickly moving to sit next to the captain. He placed the book on his lap and sighed. "What's that book you have there?"</p><p>"It's a fantasy book, about this man who loses his family to a curse, and vows to find the witch who cursed his bloodline."<br/>Armin's lip quirked up, "I am not very far into it yet, which is why I brought it on this expedition. Figured I'd have enough downtime to finish it."</p><p>Levi stayed quiet, glad that the kid was having a good time despite being in titan territory. The sun had set an hour prior, yet even then titans occasionally appeared during the nights. The older male leaned back onto the stone roof, letting the stars shine brightly above him.</p><p>"That sounds interesting, and definitely something I could see you reading" Levi continued staring at the sky, a cool breeze brushed through his hair, and he sighed slowly. "You can read that if you want, wouldn't think you'd come up here with it just to hold it" </p><p>"Ah you're right" Armin flipped open the book and read beneath the moonlight. Levi wished these domestic moments with his squad were more common. They rarely happened, and when they did they were short-lived. Throughout reading Armin's mind wandered slightly, he thought it was weird that the captain was so inviting and was not annoyed by his presence. Though he supposed he didn't know much about him other than an occasional theory about him that arose. The theories were always very unbelievable, one being that the dark-haired corporal was from beyond the wall and had lived alone fighting titans, and that's why he was so strong. Armin doubted the possibility of that one, though it would be intriguing if it were true. He continued to search his brain for any other things he'd heard, and he thought of plenty of other ones. Mostly ones heard from Jean, Sasha, or Connie, the blond wasn't sure if they were the ones to come up with them or if they had been heard from elsewhere. He supposed knowing them it could be either.</p><p>"Um, Captain, you seem more relaxed during the nights" Armin's blue eyes scanned the grey-eyed male for a reaction. Levi's mouth opened and his pupils shifted over slightly.</p><p>"Suppose so..." He hadn't thought much about it but at night he was simply at home. He looked in the distance and saw Titan bodies lying limp on the field, which made him wonder if he enjoyed the night more because the titans were less of a threat. "I enjoyed this discussion Arlert, though it's time for me to switch positions with someone else for the night watch."</p><p>Levi left through the trapdoor on the ground and climbed down the ladder carefully. Though his leg occasionally protested. He figured it would do him good to make some tea and return to the room he temporarily shared with the section commanders. He had a fleeting thought that maybe he would be able to sleep tonight.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>That morning by sunrise they packed up and left, only smothered fires and shifted ruble being evidence of them being there. They spread out into the formation, nearing the location. Everyone was nervous some more so than others. Levi for one was not nervous.</p><p> He kept telling himself that.</p><p>After a half-hour of riding out into the hills and plateau, they entered the approximate area that the bodies of his fallen comrades had been left. The lower-ranking soldiers had been ordered to patrol the area and send a red flare if a titan was spotted. </p><p>Hange squad, Levi squad, and Klaus squad gathered in the middle of the valley, all collecting themselves for the task at hand. Picking up and retrieving the dead and possibly rotting corpses of their former comrades. Jean looked around, staring at primarily Eren and Armin, both of them appearing calm, though Armins' hand visibly flexed and his stance ran tense in his knees and jaw. Eren looked rather normal, his eyes are still hot with a flame that dared not to flicker out. </p><p>Mikasa and Nifa neared a bundle of white sheets both women hesitant but determined to get their job done. The body felt stiff; it had been a week of course it would be, and fragile to the point they felt they would accidentally snap the corpse in two. Just having a mild mental image of that was enough to make Nifa gag. The putrid smell of rotting flesh and blood didn't help her cause either.</p><p>They carried the body to one of the few carts and placed it down. Moblit, Hange, and Kenji; a fellow member of the Hange squad to Nifa, stood holding clipboards and naming the deceased. Everyone followed their suit and the bodies pilled on the carts, people were accounted for, and now only one body remained to be found; the one of Petra Ral. Hange sighed, they looked up at the sky, their mouth ticking down, wondering why this had to have happened in the first place. </p><p>Levi stood in front of a white sheet, one covered in blood, dirt, and grass. The body it had contained laying face down on the ground a foot away. "I'm sorry, I wish we could have brought you home sooner," Levi longingly stared at the body of the deceased. It had short honey-blond hair and rather short stature. "Eren blames himself, and I blame myself. When it comes down to it there should really be nothing to blame, to begin with. Thank you for helping humanity...Petra"</p><p>Levi stepped away and allowed two soldiers from Klaus squad to carry Her body away. Levi remained in the fixed position staring vaguely at the grass and maybe just everywhere.  Erwin approached him nudging his shoulder and beginning to speak.</p><p>Erwin sighed glancing towards the forest, and Levi looked at the commander snapping out from his prior state. "Levi," he paused, the male in question turned to look at the commander "Send your squad into the forest, make them check the area. We did not get much of a chance last time, so I would like to make sure we are thorough."</p><p>Levi's eyes widened, he felt going into that forest would be a death wish. "Alright, I am going with them."</p><p>"No" Erwin looked at Levi, Quirking his brow down. "We need you here protecting the carts, we just recovered these bodies we can not risk anything happening."</p><p>Levi only took orders from people he respected, this was a well-known fact. Levi trusted Erwin, that was another true and well-known fact. So why did he feel so conflicted as to whether or not he should obey?</p><p>"If it helps I can send Hange with your squad. I just can not send you, as you know the main objective of this expedition was to recover the bodies; and we have. Now it is your job to protect them."</p><p>Levi felt taken back and conflicted. His expression shifted to surprise, he genuinely had no idea how to react. "I can't do that, I trust Hange, they are probably one of the only people I would ever trust with my squad. I also understand that the point of all this was to get the bodies of the dead, Hell I'm overjoyed that this all went so well. I felt as though none of this would ever happen, that I would never see the faces of my squad members again. But that's exactly it, I did not think I would ever see my squad members' faces again because they are all dead! Because I left them, I was not there to help them."  Levi stood staring at Erwin, the urge to punch the blond was great but Levi refrained. "I know it is futile, I know they will all eventually die. But I want that to be later rather than sooner. So go eat horse shit or something, I am going with them."</p><p>"It seems your adamant, I suppose I have to let you go" Levi scowled and threw himself onto his horse. His gear dug unto his skin slightly and the straps were uncomfortable. The grey-eyed male figured Erwin was being irrational, which made Levi frustrated. </p><p>He went to go and gather his squad and begin to move towards the forest.</p><p> </p><p>The forest was dense and removed from the rest of the group, it felt almost alien even though they had only a week prior been here. surveying the trees showed remnants of blood and dirt. Their horses trotted along slowly allowing their riders to keep an eye out for abnormalities. Levi called for them to stop for a moment, everyone paused looking at the corporal with confusion. </p><p>"Switch to your gear, go slow and stay in formation no matter what." </p><p>No one questioned his decision yet they still wondered what led to this decision. Levi was in front of the group leading them through the forest, he would rather not be on the ground, he had heard something; though not entirely sure what it may have been, it was there. It was a low rumble that could have easily come from the earth, but something about it sounded unnatural. The uneasy feeling that had settled in the pit of his stomach before they had even left was now presenting itself again.</p><p>Ignoring it Levi and his squad continued further in, they planned to stop where the cannons and hooks had previously been to contain the female titan.  That being it was rather far into the forest, to the point it would be a minimum of thirty minutes before anyone could contact them even at full speed on ODM gear. </p><p>Levi really didn't like that, he couldn't do anything about it though. The trees became dense and the paths less traveled. They all stopped observing the ruble of the cannons that were never moved. There was blood on the ground and trees; presumably of the female titan, and possibly of the scouts. Leaves on the trees waved through the wind and some bark splintered and snapped under brown boots. "Corporal, is there anything in specific we are searching for?" Mikasa looked around, her eyes searching for something. </p><p>"No, just observing the area for anything that could lead us to the female titans' identity and origin."  His eyes scanned the forest ground, nothing out of the ordinary; Just dirt leaves and broken-off tree limbs. The search continued till the sun began to set and finishing up their search. Armin grabbed samples of the blood that coated the trees, along with samples of things he thought might be useful. Sasha, Armin, and Connie had been set to search the ground while Mikasa, Eren, and Jean stayed in the trees with captain Levi. </p><p>The corporal sat on a higher branch than the three teens, simply observing them and resting his injured leg. The view was gorgeous, trees and colorful leaves through the trunks and branches, and in the blue sky, three birds were flying by. They looked so free, so willing to just let everything go. Let stress and society roll off of them and into the wind as they soared.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm sorta happy with how this turned out idk, it was hard to write but the plot is progressing and I am excited about the next chapter!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4 ½</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Terrors await in the forest</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>We uh...Fuck, it's been a while, hasn't it? Yeah sorry about that, I really tried to make this longer and get it out sooner, but I went on vacation for a week so I had no time to write. I have also been preparing for final exams since the new semester started like last week for me. I split this in half as I haven't had the time to write recently though I will have the second part come out hopefully friday as I am off school that day.<br/>Also, check the end of the chapter notes for something.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"We should turn back, get out of this stupid forest," Levi ordered. His squad all began to gather themselves all flying back into the trees. The group that was on the forest floor froze.</p><p>"Um, Captain? What is that" Sasha muttered staring into the trees and off past them. "Is that a titan!?"</p><p>Levi hooked into the tree he had remained on and began to lower himself, landing quite harshly on the ground next to the three teens.<br/>
The older male looked to where the group had been looking..." shit...Get into the trees! NOW!" </p><p>The titan began to charge towards them, behind four more titans followed. Generally this would not have been an issue though them presumably being abnormals paired with the density of the forest, the sun retreating, and his injury. It was gonna be hard to take them out. If not impossible for most of his team, maybe not Mikasa, though even then he doubted she could take both out. Still, they had a job to do.</p><p>The team moved quickly Jean, Mikasa and Levi charged towards the titans, they were the strongest on ODM meaning they had the best chances in such conditions as these. Armin, Eren, and Connie flew behind them with Sasha being above the prior mentioned group.</p><p>The group of titans met the humans Mikasa took hers out with practiced ease then Jeans cut into the nape, he cursed himself, it was too shallow...</p><p>Levi moved in to help him, swooping over the titan's arm and blinding it, followed by him slicing its nape deeper, the steam started to pour out suggesting it was dead. Three titans remained Sasha, and Connie had sloppily been taking care of one while Armin and Eren followed in-suite and were trying to take it down themselves. </p><p>One remained...Where was it? Levi flung around,  the titan was out of his sight, he knew it was there somewhere though. His question was soon answered as he heard muffled screams of terror come from his team. </p><p>Levi looked down. </p><p>He then understood their screams of terror.</p><p>A large hand had grasped at his body; crushing him in its grasp. His body went limp. He tried hard to get out of its grasp, though it was to no avail, his leg started to throb and his vision was quickly spotted with darkness.</p><p>"You guys run! Run to the group! Leave me and the forest. Get there safely or else!" Levi tried to sting his words with venom though they sounded dull. </p><p>The hiss of wires and crunches of tree limbs were signs Levi took as them having left. He was so close to the titan's mouth he could smell the rotting flesh embedded in its teeth. It was grotesque, the sound of saliva squishing in its mouth, and soon to be the sickly crunch of bones. </p><p>His body was crushed so tightly that his lungs no longer wanted to inhale anything.<br/>
Air rapidly left his body no matter how hard he gasped for a sliver of breath. In that air was a mixture of screams and blood pooling out of his mouth. His screams rang and hurt, felt bloody and painful. </p><p>Then it stopped. The world was dark, with no sound, sense of fear, or pain. Simply just...</p><p>Gone.</p><p> </p><p>Horrified screams rang through the trees from the terrified teens. They flew fast and swiftly, none but one looking back at their captain.</p><p>"Jean!" Armin looked back slowing down, watching as Jean flew back towards Levi still in the titan's grasp. "Don't, You'll die!"</p><p>Ignoring his friend's pleas the tall male flew faster zipping up to the titan and cutting Levi out of its grasp. The two went tumbling to the ground, Jean's body wrapped protectively around the captain.</p><p>A blur of dark hair flew by and the titans crashed to the ground. Mikasa standing atop in their cluttered wake. "The corporal...How is he?" </p><p>Stunned slightly Jean gasped unfurling himself from the captain, he gripped the captain's wrist. A weak and shallow throb that threatened to fade flicked through his index finger. "I- I don't know, he is unconscious and...Well, his pulse is, really really, weak." </p><p>Mikasa stared at the captain clutched in Jean's arms. She was scared, scared that Levi's life would flicker away, that humanity would lose its strongest soldier, and that his squad would lose Levi as their father-like figure. Most of the Levi squad didn't have very strong parental figures in their life. Mikasa's were killed right in front of her, Armin's died before he ever got to know them because of a passion to see the outside world; Eren's were there, strong and in the past, dead because of the Titans that roamed the land. Jean never had a father in his life, always his mother and him, his mother said her, and his father just never worked out. Connie and Sasha still had fathers, though even then, Levi still was their father to them. Levi was always aiding them in one way or another, albeit normally rather bluntly or rudely, still they cared for him, and Mikasa didn't want any of them to lose him.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I made a discord server!!!!  Join it if you want, I will announce updates for different fics of mine, plus you can ask questions and just socialize.</p><p>https://discord.gg/FBEpMMr4SJ</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Levi dreams of beautiful and sad things.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So yeah a few days late but Happy Easter!! I got AoT 2 for my birthday and have kinda been playing that non-stop and forgot about writing. Oops. Anyways im proud of this chapter, still kinda short but ill get back into it in a bit I promise.</p><p>!!!!Tw!!! <br/>Mentions of throwing up, death and concussions.</p><p>Edit: right after writing this chapter I threw up so uh idk what was up with that. I felt fine all day until I started writing, that's kinda weird. Fine now tho btw</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Levi felt his world sway, consciousness nonexistent. A very nice dream enraptured him into fantasy. He and Hange sat at a table, sipping tea as the sun rose over the land. A giggle rose from Hange's gentle lips, "You should stop scowling, it doesn't suit you" </p><p>The wind blew through their hair as they tucked it behind their ears. Staring into Levi's eyes, seemingly reading his soul. </p><p>"Why smile" Hange seemed unimpressed with this answer, they rose walking to him and placing their hands on his shoulders, wrapping it around him. "When everything hurts?"</p><p>They sighed lips taught across their face, chin quirked facing Levi. "Because it will lessen the pain. Make it easier for when Petra comes to pick you up." </p><p>"Wh-Why would she pick me up?" Levi felt Hange's grasp lessen supporting themselves on the chair Levi was sitting on. Something about Petra's name slipping through his lips felt cold. Cold, Dark, quiet words gasping through breaths. </p><p>-----<br/>"Fire a flare, the group might see it and come to our aid!"<br/>-----</p><p>A loud ringing began to fill his ears, reminded him of a gunshot, or maybe. A flare gun? They were in Levi's office, why would they hear a flair gun in there. Levi blinked, staring at his surroundings, Hange melting into his peripheral vision. </p><p>A view of a red leather desk chair next to a desk made from some type of pine. Feather Quills pens and ink sat atop, resting aside a stack of papers, none of which he was able to read from where he was.</p><p>"Why wouldn't she, no reason not to have her bring you to Eld, Oluo, and Gunther. Y'know thinking about it, maybe Furlan and Isabel might be there as well." The brunette tapped their finger to Levi's face, moving his mouth from his usual scowl to a slight contorted smirk. </p><p>"Knock it off Hange" He whipped Their hand from his face. "Why would Isabel and Furlan be there...They died." </p><p>Hange smiled slightly, knowingly, unfurling their arms from around Levi's shoulders and stepping back. "Oh, your right, they did." Hange hummed. "Didn't they" </p><p>Levi wanted so badly to refute that, his ears rang and his body ached, pain struck him in every joint. Breathing became hard and he felt like he was going to collapse.<br/>"Oh look at that" Hange simply glanced at him running to the door. "Petra is here!"</p><p>"Im sorry, Levi but seems our times up here. I hope to talk to you again!" </p><p>Before Levi could respond, asking what they meant. A deep ache struck his head, sending him leaning forward. Sweat dripped down his face along with a thick substance that trailed slowly. </p><p>His office disappeared, revealing green trees and a dark sky lit only by the moon.<br/>"Armin! He's awake!"</p><p>Levi felt someone rush to his side, leaves crunching and feet pounding the ground. He tilted his head glancing at curious and concerned eyes, all staring directly at him. It scared him, he didn't like it, even just having woken up he felt their pity, he didn't need it. </p><p>The pairs of eyes soon cleared to reveal their respective bodies. Each one of his squad members sat to his side either crouched or sitting on the grass and leaves.</p><p>"...w-what...?" He croaked in dire need of rehydration, burning his lungs and throat.</p><p>"Good, you can talk. Can you understand us?"</p><p>Levi attempted weakly to shake his head, only sending him gasping for breath as bile rose from his throat. They all appeared panicked, Mikasa reacted quickly shifting the captain's position so that if he threw up it wouldn't be all over himself. Levi had to admit he was glad. Throwing up didn't settle well with him, not to mention having it on himself.</p><p>Armin took his slight nod as a response. "Do you know who you are?"</p><p>Ah, that's what he was doing. Checking for signs of a concussion. Based on the fact he almost threw up at that slight of a movement of his head it is possible.<br/>"Levi..."</p><p>He heard gasps of relief they seemed thankful for him knowing that. "Where are you right now" </p><p>Levi glanced around himself. He couldn't recall, it was a forest though. So that's better than nothing. "A forest"</p><p>"What forest?" </p><p>Levi remained silent...He didn't know.</p><p>"Okay, that's fine, do you know what year it is?" </p><p>"I-It's...8...um 44?"</p><p>They all visibly cringed, clearly, he had said something wrong, as to what. He couldn't say. Levi's brow quirked, what was he missing, why was that wrong, he knew it shouldn't have been. Maybe he was concussed. He didn't know, he barely knew anything at this point.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So to clarify some things, 844 is in fact the incorrect year as that is the year no regrets took place in.<br/>So yeah.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Think about your past</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey, so I lied this story isn't going to be as short as I had previously thought because I realized there was a lot more to explore than what I thought when planning the story. So now the total chapter count is 12, whether or not that will increase again is up for debate.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Levi, it's not the year 844. It's 850 now, Stay still, you had a pretty rough blow to the head on your landing a while ago"  Levi felt pain ring through him, unable to move even if he had wanted. </p><p>Suddenly a pungent smell rose over him, his brow quirked slightly glancing at the source. "Whats...That?" </p><p>Levi questioned seeing tufts of green tucked into Erens shirt as he approached. The smell was strange, almost medicinal with a hint of something sweet. "Herbs, to help disinfect your wounds. My father was a doctor, taught me a lot," Eren locked Eyes with the male on the ground. "You need medical attention. So until we can regroup with the rest of the group, this is as good as you're gonna get."</p><p>He fluttered his eyes closed, again drifting off into an abyss somewhere. He hoped when he awoke the pain would fade, and he'd be safe. Not on the dirty forest floor, in who knows where. </p><p>--</p><p>Upon waking Levi found himself groaning groggily in pain. Though it was duller than prior his head throbbed, chest ached and rattled, sending a shivering breath through his lungs. He had a cracked or even broken rib.  Around him stood the members of the 104th, all talking to each other, not seeming to have noticed Levi's conscious state. </p><p>"Hey, Where am I?" his voice came out as a whisper slow and raspy. He thought it was obvious, he had said it before, he was in a forest. Still, he questioned.</p><p>"The forest of giant trees, North of wall Rose, sir."</p><p> </p><p>What was he doing here? Better yet, where are Isabel and Farlan, shouldn't they be with him. He wasn't sure, though he felt that was something he should have known, along with who the group of people were that surrounded him. They were familiar, though his head was so muddled and felt like mush. </p><p>So since he didn't know he continues to question, "Who are you people, what did you do with Isabel and Farlan, why aren't they with me!"</p><p>"Sir, do you not recognize us?"  Sasha probed, her face filled with dread.</p><p>"Of course he wouldn't...I mean the captain didn't even know what year it is"</p><p>Levi quirked his eyebrow at that. He was still processing what was said earlier, about it being quite a few years later than he recalled. Levi also wondered why they referred to him with such formalities such as Captain, and sir. Last he checked Cadets like him were never treated with such respects. Walls, he hadn't even been on an expedition yet as far as he was aware.</p><p>He knew he was missing something major, something he should know. Though the searing pain coursing through him chose to disrupt his thoughts.</p><p>"Is that them?" The group murmured then grew louder as Levi heard horse hooves thunder against the ground. Some more chatter was audible yet he couldn't pick out any distinct words.</p><p>"Hange, Help us it's Captain Levi! He's hurt badly!" </p><p>Boots crashed against the grass as he presumed the approaching personal got off their horses. He looked up and a person stood above him. From what he could tell, though it wasn't much with his spotty vision and view from the ground, the person had no distinctly feminine nor masculine traits. That felt familiar like he knew someone like that once, once he pondered enough he realized, it was section commander Hange. </p><p>He had met them when first joining the scouts. They were crazy but good-willed, and also the only person Levi could distinctly remember.</p><p>"Hange?"</p><p>The person snapped their gaze back to him, a small quirk to their brows came to their face. "Eren, you said he has a concussion-induced memory loss correct? He didn't remember any of you guys, so why me?"</p><p>"Why, wouldn't I remember you. We didn't meet that long ago"</p><p>Levi pondered what they said, 'memory loss' that could explain his muddy thoughts. Though he wondered what events in his life he had forgotten. From what they said he had forgotten a few years of his life. He estimated and that meant he was in his early thirties, what a weird thought. </p><p>"Levi, what's the last thing you remember."</p><p>That question struck him with a strange feeling, one of pain and fear. His heart rate shot up and his breathing became heavier. He was gonna vomit, he really was gonna vomit. But oh god did he not want to. His chest ached just from the thought of it. He wasn't sure his ribs could take anymore strain.</p><p>"Help me" Levi gasped.</p><p> Hange's brow quirked looking at Levi trying to figure out what they were wanted for until they realized the pained expression he wore. Hange picked the man up and set him in a sitting position, allowing for him to empty the contents of his stomach on the ground next to him.</p><p>"Are you okay now?" Levi muttered some form of denial followed by a gasp for breath. "Okay, breathe, your gonna have to tell me what that was about. Doesn't have to be right now but eventually. For now, calm down and try and steady your breathing."</p><p>"Isabel, Farlan, They...They're gone-" Levi stuttered out panting.</p><p>Hange's eyes flicked with worry, they knew what was happening. The grief he had experienced years prior was flooding back to him. No wonder he had such a bad reaction. For now, though, there was nothing they could do. They had to get Levi back to the walls, he was injured. It seems the 104th had mostly taken care of the life-threatening wounds.</p><p> Some cuts and scrapes along with deep dark bruising lined Levi's pale skin, blood oozed from the shallow scrapes. They hoped that Levi would regain his memory sometime soon though.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Will Levi regain his memories? Will he recover, or will there be more long-term effects, wait till next week and find out! (Or not my upload schedule is very bad.)</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If I didn't make it clear this takes place after the events of season one, and any inaccuracies were either unintentional or I noticed them/ my betas saw them but I felt it was better to keep them.</p><p>Also this is the first story I wrote on my laptop so I hope it is better than my other fics.</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>